Sunday, October 15, 2017

Christine (1983)

It was inevitable that the King of Horror fiction in the 1970s and 80s Stephen King and the King of Horror films in the 1970s and 80s John Carpenter would unite at some point for a film adaptation of one of King's novels. I was a huge fan of Stephen King and John Carpenter in high school. I had read most of King's early novels (check my book shelf) including Salem's Lot, The Shining, and The Stand. I loved Carpenter's ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK (1981) and THE THING (1982). Yet the one King novel that Carpenter would choose to direct was the one King novel that I snubbed and refused to read. The novel and then movie was CHRISTINE (1983).

You would think I would want to see a film named after my wife (even though I didn't know her at the time CHRISTINE was released). But I didn't (she spells her first name with a K by the way). Until recently, I was never into vintage cars. The Christine in CHRISTINE is not a woman but a 1957 Plymouth Fury. Lastly, the cast for CHRISTINE was not on my who's who of actors I had to race to a theater to see on the big screen. Keith Gordon, John Stockwell, Alexandra Paul.  All fine actors but unknowns that I wasn't aching to watch for 110 minutes.


Having now watched CHRISTINE a couple of times, it's a taut, atmospheric film by director John Carpenter.  Carpenter creates a sense of dread as CHRISTINE becomes more and more powerful. Themes and motifs emerged from CHRISTINE that appear in other Stephen King novels (and film adaptations). CHRISTINE provides us with another ugly duckling (like Sissy Spacek in the title role of 1976's CARRIE) who discovers a power that won't end well for them. King also introduces a new type of evil, not a hotel or a town, but an automobile with a mind and agenda of its own. My initially not wanting to see CHRISTINE as a teenager might have been prophetic as CHRISTINE would not be a box office hit.

CHRISTINE was adapted by Bill Phillips based on King's novel. The film opens with the origin of Christine. From George Thorogood's Bad to the Bone playing on the soundtrack, Carpenter tells us that Christine was a bad seed from the moment she came off the assembly line in Detroit in 1957. Her hood clamps down on a worker's hand, mangling his fingers. Later, a manager sits in the car, smoking a cigar, a butt falling on it's nice leather seat. He's found dead a few hours later, the Fury's radio playing "Not Fade Away" by Buddy Holly.  Jump ahead to 1979. Rockbridge High School football star Dennis Guilder (John Stockwell) picks up his nerdy best friend Arnie Cunningham (Keith Gordon) as a new school year begins. Dennis and Arnie are an unlikely pair. School stud and school geek. But some things never change. In shop class, Arnie is terrorized by school bullies Buddy Reperton (William Ostrander), Moochie (Malcolm Danare), and Don Vandenberg (Stuart Charno) until Dennis comes to the rescue.


On their way home from school, Arnie sees an old piece of junk car sitting in a deserted lot. It's a 1958 Plymouth Fury. Arnie buys the car from the lot's owner George LeBay (Roberts Blossom). Against his mother Regina's (Christine Belford) wishes, Arnie keeps the car and takes it to Darnell's Do It Yourself Garage run by the cantankerous Will Darnell (Robert Prosky). Arnie sets about restoring the Plymouth. As the Plymouth undergoes a transformation from junk to cherry, Arnie begins to change. He's no longer the nerdy, unsure teenager. He becomes confident, dark, dangerous. He's taken on Christine's evil persona.

Arnie begins dating the new girl in high school Leigh Cabot (Alexandra Paul) to the surprise of jock Dennis.  Arnie and Leigh watch Dennis's football game, leaning on Christine.  Dennis is injured, forcing him to miss the rest of the season. Dennis begins to look into Arnie's metamorphosis which began as he refurbished Christine. Dennis revisits George LeBay and discovers that LeBay's brother and family all died inside Christine.  Arnie treats Christine like a girlfriend.  At a drive-in movie theater, Leigh almost chokes in the car.  Christine has become jealous of Arnie's friends like Dennis and Leigh.

Buddy, Moochie, and Don sneak into Darnell's garage one night and vandalize Christine.  Horribly disfigured, Christine supernaturally rebuilds herself on her own. Christine stalks the vandals, killing them one by one . A local police detective Rudolph Junkins (Harry Dean Stanton) begins investigating. He first looks into who vandalized Arnie's prized car but soon has to deal with the deaths of Buddy and his gang and the garage owner Darnell. Meanwhile, Dennis confides with Leigh that they need to destroy Christine to save Arnie.  They lure Christine and Arnie back to Darnell's garage for a final battle between car and Caterpillar tractor.


I imagine Stephen King (and possibly John Carpenter) may have been outcasts in high school, uncool to the regular crowd. King's stories often focus on underdogs and the disadvantaged that rise up to confront evil. Corey Haim in a wheelchair confronting a werewolf in his town in SILVER BULLET (1985). Little Danny Lloyd fighting off deranged Dad Jack Nicholson in THE SHINING (1980). The four young boys from STAND BY ME (1985) beating the bullies to see the dead teenager's body first. The Losers Club in IT (2017) battling Pennywise the Clown. But King also makes some of these cast offs and ugly ducklings have unique powers to deal with bullies and evil incarnate. They don't always handle their new found powers very well. Drew Barrymore using her telekinesis to start fires in FIRESTARTER (1984). Sissy Spacek in CARRIE destroying her entire high school and classmates with her vengeful telekinesis after they humiliate her one time too many. In CHRISTINE, it's Keith Gordon as Arnie transforming from geek to cool dude only he's possessed by the demonic Plymouth Fury he restored. Christine is overprotective. She's one jealous girlfriend. Arnie takes on Christine's persona, killing and maiming anyone who gets in their way.

King and Carpenter have both dealt with pure evil before in their works. In Carpenter's HALLOWEEN (1978), the killer Michael Myers is evil personified, seemingly indestructible. In THE THING, it's the alien stuck in the Arctic, hiding in various human host bodies, attempting to reach civilization and end the world. For King, we've seen evil living in a mountain hotel in THE SHINING or a vampire bringing horror to a small Maine town in SALEM'S LOT (1979).  In CHRISTINE, it's a classic 1958 Plymouth Fury that represents evil.  She becomes attached to her owner and hurts anyone that tries to come between her and Arnie.  Arnie starts out a nice, awkward teenager but becomes transformed into a brooding, angry dangerous person.  Arnie and Christine become one.


Stephen King's choice of car for CHRISTINE is a good one.  The Plymouth Fury, in a way, resembles a shark.  Big tail fins, teeth like grill, and twin headlights that flash on like big eyes.  The Fury is cherry red, almost like the color of blood.  If Satan had a hot car, it might be a '58 Plymouth Fury.  The console lights up with a creepy green glow, the supernatural life force of Christine. Carpenter makes the car like a predator especially when it's on the prowl, hunting the hoodlums that vandalized it.  Buddy's death is especially wicked, the flaming Plymouth following Buddy down the road like a wolf until it runs him over, Buddy's body roasted.

CHRISTINE is the perfect union of Stephen King and John Carpenter.  Besides both men ruling the horror genre, both King and Carpenter are big rock and roll fans. CHRISTINE has plenty of vintage rock and roll music in the film. King played in a rock and roll band made up of other writers.  Carpenter made the TV film ELVIS (1979) with Kurt Russell.  Christine pumps out classic 1950's Rock and Roll tunes to convey what she's thinking by the likes of Buddy Holly, Richie Valens, Dion & the Belmonts, and Little Richard.  Carpenter along with Alan Howarth composed the music for CHRISTINE. CHRISTINE returns Carpenter to suburbia where he scared the living daylights out of people with HALLOWEEN. Instead of scaring us with empty sidewalks and hedges that could hide a killer in HALLOWEEN, Carpenter gives us dark driveways and streets where CHRISTINE lurks.

We've talked about one type of hero in Stephen King stories.  The handicapped kid, the nerd, the overweight kid or the kid with asthma fighting evil.  But CHRISTINE gives us Dennis (John Stockwell), the typical hero. Good looking, ladies man, star athlete. Yet Dennis is to some degree a failed or flawed hero.  Early on, Dennis sticks up for Arnie in front of Buddy and his gang. But then Dennis suffers an injury during a football game (did Christine influence it by distracting Dennis?). He has to have crutches. He's handicapped in his ability to protect Arnie or Leigh. Arnie becomes the alpha male and Dennis the weak one. When he's called a hero by Detective Junkins, Dennis laments, "A real hero could have saved Arnie." It's a nice juxtaposition between weak Arnie and strong Dennis. They switch roles as the film progresses.


Stephen King has been intrigued by the idea of cars (and other vehicles) having a mind and soul of their own previously.  King wrote a short story called Trucks about a world where cars and trucks and all types of vehicles ruled mankind.  In his only directorial effort, King would write and direct a film version of the short story called MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE (1986) starring Emilio Estavez. The movie would be a flop. My hunch is CHRISTINE materialized from King's Trucks story but on a much smaller scale. The granddaddy and best movie of this sub-genre is still DUEL (1971), a TV movie directed by a young Steven Spielberg and written by horror/science fiction master Richard Matheson about a semi-truck menacing Dennis Weaver. One last bit of car trivia. CHRISTINE'S production team used 28 Plymouth Fury's for the film.

I honestly didn't want to see CHRISTINE earlier in my film watching career primarily because of the three leads.  They were mostly unknowns. I liked Keith Gordon in Brian DePalma's DRESSED TO KILL (1980) but like his character in that film and CHRISTINE, Gordon is more of a nerd than a matinee idol.  After watching CHRISTINE, I discovered that I thought John Stockwell who plays Dennis was John Pankow, an actor who I never really liked (even though he's in a film I like 1985's TO LIVE AND DIE IN L.A. directed by William Friedkin).  I found Pankow to be an irritating actor.  But Stockwell is actually very good in CHRISTINE. It turns out Stockwell also appeared in TOP GUN (1986) and would later become a director himself, directing INTO THE BLUE (2005) starring Paul Walker and Jessica Alba. For Alexandra Paul, CHRISTINE was one of her first films and it shows.  Her acting is hesitant and not very assured early on. She's supposed to be the new beautiful girl on campus but I didn't find her alluring until the end of the film when hair and makeup finally made her look stunning.  Paul would go on to star in TV's BAYWATCH from 1992 to 1997.


Making up for his young talent, Carpenter wisely casts two veteran actors in CHRISTINE who chew up their supporting roles.  Harry Dean Stanton (ALIEN, PARIS TEXAS) plays the small but vital role of Detective Junkins.   Junkins is one of the few positive adult role models in the film. Stanton worked with Carpenter on ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK.  Robert Prosky (THE NATURAL) as Will Darnell has fun as the ornery garage owner who lets Arnie rebuild Christine in his facility. William Ostrander who plays the lead bully Buddy Repperton is terrifying but looks much too old to be in high school (he was 24 when the film was made).  But then we all went to high school with kids who looked older than their age, right?  Look for a young Kelly Preston (TWINS) in a small role as high school cheerleader Roseanne.

Stephen King was a hot commodity in the early 80s.  I began to stop reading his novels after Misery. King was branching out into new types of horror stories but I didn't find them as compelling. Like CHRISTINE, you can't keep a good horror storyteller down (although King never really went away). Today, Stephen King novels and short stories are popping up in the theaters and television like never before.  The blockbuster 2017 remake of IT, GERALD'S GAME on Netflix, and a new version of THE STAND in the works to name but a few. Some of King's adaptations have been hits like CARRIE or THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION (1994). Others like CUJO (1983) or THE DARK TOWER (2017) flopped. CHRISTINE falls into that in-between category. Having John Carpenter direct CHRISTINE made the film more interesting than if someone else had directed it.

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

It was Christmas season and I was at my best friend's annual family Christmas party, the best Christmas party I've ever been to. We all got presents, the parents drank too much, and Santa Claus would make his yearly visit looking very much like my Dad's best friend Art.  But one year, I was more dazzled by what was on television than holiday gifts or egg nog or Santa Art.  DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (1971) was on television and I couldn't pull myself away from it.  Sean Connery was back as James Bond, this time in Las Vegas, battling his nemesis Blofeld once again only it was a different actor playing Blofeld (Charles Gray instead of Donald Pleasence or Telly Savalas).  There were car chases and sexy assassins Bambi and Thumper and oh yes, the voluptuous red head Jill St. John. I was in double O seventh heaven.

DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is the swan song for Sean Connery in his last appearance in a Broccoli/Saltzman production of James Bond. Connery had appeared in five of the first six Bond films so far (George Lazenby stepping in as Bond for 1969's ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE). Most of DIAMONDS takes place in Las Vegas which seems like a perfect location for the gambling/womanizing Bond. It's directed by Guy Hamilton who directed GOLDFINGER (1964), probably the best Bond film to date. The screenplay is by Bond veteran Richard Maibaum and newcomer Tom Mankiewicz who would bring some fun and levity to the Bond series. And some of the best talent involved with the Bond series are along for the farewell including Production Designer Ken Adam, Cinematographer Ted Moore, Composer John Barry, and the great Shirley Bassey (GOLDFINGER) who sings the catchy "Diamonds Are Forever" theme song over the opening credits.


For the first three quarters of the film, DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is a funny, action packed, globe trotting Bond film that I rank as one of my favorites. The finale is a bit of a let down, perhaps the filmmakers hands tied by the location (an oil platform off the coast of  Baja) and some lazy direction and staging. DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER opens with James Bond (Sean Connery) chasing down leads on the whereabouts of his arch-nemesis Ernst Stavros Blofeld (Charles Gray). Bond finally tracks him down at a South American spa where Blofeld is attempting to make duplicates of himself. Bond disrupts the plot and supposedly kills Blofeld under a blanket of mud.  Back in London, Bond and M (Bernard Lee) meet with Sir Donald (Laurence Naismith) who is troubled by a rash of stolen diamonds in South Africa.  Instead of appearing on the black market, someone is stockpiling the diamonds. Even more distressing, everyone who touches the stolen diamonds ends up dead, courtesy of possibly cinema's first gay killers Mr. Kidd (Putter Smith) and Mr. Wint (Bruce Glover).

Bond's pursuit of the diamonds takes him from Amsterdam where (posing as a diamond courier) he picks up the stolen gems from the beautiful Tiffany Case (Jill St. John) to Las Vegas where he's nearly cremated at the Mort Slumber mortuary after delivering the diamonds (only Bond brings fake stones as insurance for his life). Teaming up with CIA agent Felix Leiter (Norman Burton, the 4th different actor to portray Leiter), Bond turns his attention to hotel and casino magnate Willard Whyte (singer and sausage spokesman Jimmy Dean), a Howard Hughes like millionaire who hasn't been seen in years.  Tiffany outfoxes the agents and gives the real diamonds to a confidant of Whyte, German scientist Dr. Metz (Joseph Furst). Bond follows Metz and the diamonds to one of Whyte's holdings, an aerospace company in the desert outside of Las Vegas.



Metz takes the diamonds to a lab to place on a satellite he's working on for Whyte.  After escaping through a mock Moon landing set, jumping into a moon rover, and chased by ATV's, Bond reports back to Felix his findings. When they return to the desert facility, it's empty.  Bond decides to pay a visit to the reclusive Willard Whyte catching a ride on top of  Whyte's private elevator to the top of his hotel where he supposedly resides. Inside, Bond discovers it's Blofeld who has hijacked Whyte's operations and impersonated Whyte (courtesy of a voice scrambler). Blofeld is behind the stolen diamonds and satellite. Blofeld still has another version of himself but Bond dispatches one of the Blofeld's leaving just one Blofeld remaining. After escaping yet another attempt by Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd to kill him, Bond and Felix raid Whyte's summer home  where they find the real Willard Whyte held hostage by Blofeld's female bodyguards Bambi (Lola Larson) and Thumper (Trina Parks).

Blofeld sends Whyte's right hand man Bert Saxby (Bruce Cabot) to kill Whyte at his summer home but Saxby's shot instead.  Blofeld sends the satellite into space, the diamonds used as a laser to destroy military targets and even cities unless his global extortion demands are met. Bond and Whyte return to the Whyte House (Whyte's hotel) to figure out Blofeld's whereabouts. When Bond mentions Baja, Whyte exclaims, "Baja! I haven't got anything in Baja!" Cut to an oil platform off the Baja coast where Bond parachutes in to defeat Blofeld and save Tiffany while Felix and several U.S. Army helicopters fire missiles to destroy the control center that operates the diamond laser satellite.


So what is it about DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER that captured the imagination of a young CrazyFilmGuy and kept him from participating at his favorite Christmas party? DIAMONDS has a fun, breezy vibe to it, moving from set piece to set piece, location to location at a good clip, not taking too long to unfold plot like THUNDERBALL (1965). It's very much in the same style as director Hamilton's previous Bond outing, the fantastic GOLDFINGER. The film has a nice helping of cleavage and fascinating characters one would expect to find in Las Vegas.  Although DIAMONDS is full of fights, chases, and explosions, it's the dialogue, puns, inside jokes, double entendres and sexual innuendos that might be the best in the series. We know we're in for a good time from the beginning when a bad guy at a blackjack table tells the dealer "Hit me" and Bond gives him a right cross to the face.

We have a great opening prologue in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER that could serve as the finale for any Bond film with Bond supposedly dispatching Blofeld in a bubbling mud pool. But it's only a tease. We've got  two excellent Bond vehicle chases. First, we have Bond hopping into a moon buggy and chased by three ATVs (All Terrain Vehicles) out in the desert. Then, there's Bond and Tiffany racing a Mustang like Steve McQueen around downtown Vegas, chased by the local redneck cops (shades of LIVE AND LET DIE'S Clifton James to come) with Bond flipping the Mustang up on its side to escape through a narrow alley. DIAMONDS is the beginning of some great practical vehicle chases in Bond films after too many rear projection chases in the older films.


Assassins and killers also come in two's in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. We have the gay, odd assassins Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd who dispatch dentists and little old ladies with aplomb and wit. Wint and Kidd are like a murderous married couple. They will get their comeuppance on a cruise ship in a perfect ending to the film. Then, we have Go-Go girl killers Bambi and Thumper. These acrobatic hit women nearly kill Bond in their bikinis and short shorts as they hold Willard Whyte hostage. DIAMONDS reminds us that women are just as lethal as men in the world of James Bond.

Screenwriters Maibaum and Mankiewicz make DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER one of the more humorous Bond films in the series. The double entendres and inside jokes are fast and furious. When Tiffany asks Bond if he prefers blondes or brunettes, Bond remarks, "As long as the collar and cuffs match." Don't worry. I had to ask someone what it meant as well but the answer will make you chuckle. Later, when Bond hides the diamonds on the body of the dead courier at Customs, CIA agent Felix Leiter can't find them until Bond makes a crack about family jewels. I believe new writer Tom Mankiewicz brought a lot of these jokes to the film. He would continue the one liners and sexual innuendos when Roger Moore took over the Bond role. Mankiewicz would also write LIVE AND LET DIE (1973) and THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN (1974).

The filmmakers also have fun with an enigmatic legend of Las Vegas and a conspiracy theory.
Reclusive billionaire Howard Hughes (HH) lived in Las Vegas, owned hotels, casinos, and aerospace companies, and stayed out of the limelight later in life. DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER gives us millionaire hotel, casino, and aerospace magnate Willard Whyte (WW) played by Jimmy Dean who we hear about through most of the film but never see until toward the end.  We're led to believe the enigmatic Whyte may be up to no good. But his allusive nature stems from a more sinister reason.



Around the late 60s and early 70s, conspiracy theorists postulated that NASA and the government faked the moon landing, filming it instead on a television sound stage possibly by director Stanley Kubrick. This has never been proven . DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER has fun with this conspiracy at Whyte's aerospace facility. When Bond is discovered to be snooping around, he's chased by security guards. Bond stumbles across a soundstage where two astronauts are walking around a moon set. Bond almost does a double take before jumping into the moon rover to escape. It's a funny bit.

DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is a nice nostalgic viewfinder of Las Vegas circa 1970s. The car chase around the night time streets and casinos of Main Street was the main strip.  Now it's known as the old section of Las Vegas circa 2017. Hotels that appear in DIAMONDS like Circus Circus, the Mint, and the Tropicana no longer exist, torn down by demolition and expansion. In their place have risen modern hotels and casinos like the Wynn or the Monte Carlo. My first visit to Las Vegas in the early 80s, I specifically went into Circus Circus because I had seen it in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. Sadly, neither James Bond nor Tiffany Case were anywhere in sight.


The Bond films have always had inspired casting from Miss Universe beauty queens such as Daniela Bianchi (FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE) to former wrestlers like Harold Sakata in GOLDFINGER. With the series making its most significant foray into the United States, DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER has some of its most eclectic casting. Who would have imagined country western singer and sausage spokesman Jimmy Dean as the seemingly reclusive millionaire Willard Whyte? But it works. Jill St. John as Tiffany Case makes the jump from B movies like THE LOST WORLD (1960) to the first American actress to play a Bond girl. St. John is flirty and has good chemistry with Connery. The supporting Bond girl Lana Wood who plays Plenty O'Toole in DIAMONDS has an interesting six degrees of separation with St. John. Lana's sister was actress Natalie Wood. When Natalie Wood drowned off Catalina Island in 1981, she was married to actor Robert Wagner (PRINCE VALIANT). Wagner would later remarry...to Jill St. John, making St. John and Lana Wood sisters-in-law (which would not go well).

Some familiar faces from the golden age of cinema also appear in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. Bruce Cabot who would battle King Kong for Fay Wray in KING KONG (1933) plays Whyte's traitorous lieutenant Bert Saxby.  And film noir veteran Marc Lawrence (THE ASPHALT JUNGLE) appears as one of Blofeld's henchmen.  Even Las Vegas comedian Leonard Barr makes a brief cameo as Shady Tree, another colorful Vegas performer working for Blofeld. Look for actress Valerie Perrine (LENNY) as one of the showgirls standing next to Shady Tree during his opening act.

This would be Sean  Connery's last go around as James Bond in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (unless you count his return as Bond in Irvin Kershner's 1982 NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN, a remake of THUNDERBALL). James Bond would make Sean Connery an international movie star. Connery would define the James Bond role. He would make white dinner jackets, martinis shaken not stirred, and Aston Martins forever popular. In my opinion, he will always be the best 007. Connery gives his best for his final performance in a Broccoli/Saltzman Bond production, tongue firmly in cheek. Connery would continue to have a fantastic career appearing in hit films like John Huston's THE MAN WHO WOULD BE KING (1975) and Brian DePalma's THE UNTOUCHABLES (1987) in which Connery would win the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor.

I had raved how great Donald Pleasence was as Blofeld in YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE (1967) but I have a soft spot for Charles Gray's take as Blofeld in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. Pleasence's Blofeld was more cold and sinister with that vertical scar across his eye. Gray's Blofeld is a bit more cuddly, white haired and urbane, with a better sense of humor and irony (again I feel writer Mankiewicz's hand involved). Because of the whole plastic surgery subplot, Blofeld can look different in DIAMONDS. He doesn't have the bald dome or scar (Sam Mendes' SPECTRE would reveal how Blofeld received that scar). If DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER had come out a few years later, Blofeld could have just cloned himself instead of creating surgically altered doubles. Charles Gray also appeared in YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE as Henderson, a British agent over in Japan. It was a very brief appearance i.e. he's killed quite quickly. Gray's Blofeld is a memorable role and one of the main reasons I love DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER.
As enjoyable as DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is for three quarters of the film, the climactic siege of Blofeld's oil platform is a let down of epic proportions.  YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE had huge explosions and somersaulting stunt men. DIAMONDS has poorly choreographed action and stunts.  Blofeld's security is as lax as his tongue when Bond parachutes onto the platform. Blofeld is overly confident and pretty much lets Bond sabotage his master plan. It's a bad lapse in judgment by the filmmakers.  They redeem themselves with one final scene as Bond sniffs out (literally) the deadly team of Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd on his cruise with Tiffany, disposing of the gay assassins.

Although the final climactic battle is weak, the majority of DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is the perfect film to wrap up Sean Connery's portrayal as British agent James Bond. After countless fights with assassins like Red Grant and Oddjob, numerous confrontations with arch villains like Dr. No and Ernst Stavros Blofeld, and endless romantic encounters with the likes of Honey Ryder, Pussy Galore, and Tiffany Case, it was time for Connery to move on with the next stage of his career and hand over the reins to the Bond series to the next James Bond -- Roger Moore. I wonder if SPECTRE sent Connery any balloons or a singing telegram or a cake to bid their sworn enemy goodbye.